Sorry ladies, I love bananas

2013-10-21 Sorry ladies I love bananas shirt
Written by: Jehan Daal

This is a dedication to my dear friend, who finally found love and happiness. I’m so proud of you. Lot’s of love from me to you!

Just some story:
Alan and his colleagues gather around the fire and drink some wine. Time to relax now after another day filled with sportive activities. Tomorrow their team building weekend is officially over. He was happy because he could use some good night sleep in a real bed, instead of sleeping on a thin mattress in some forest.

One of them suggest to play a game. Truth or dare. Alan hates that game. Every time they ask him questions, it’s always about women and sex. How many sex partners did he have, at what age did he loose his virginity and so on. The truth is that he looks good and yes he is always surrounded by the ladies, but for a totally different reason. His male friends and male colleagues envy him, but honestly there is not need to. He kissed a girl ones in his life and he really disliked it. Boobs can’t turn him on and the thought of having sex with a woman… God no!

In his dreams he simply says “sorry ladies, I love bananas”, and no one cares about that. In reality that would never happen. He is a sport physiotherapist, the best of the practice and first choice of the semi-professional players. Those days will be over if they find out that he is gay. They’re all fine with people being gay. As long as it is not a team member, who will be showering next to them after the game. Or a sport physiotherapist who would most certainly sneaky stare at their penis, while trying to fix his knee. Such a bull. Like he is attracted to every men and would jump on their backs while being butt naked. Besides that, he is a professional.

Real life
“Don’t you think it is weird that I’m gay?” My friend asks me a bit insecure.
“Do you think it is weird that I’m black?” I respond.
He laughs.
“But you are black since the day you were born. I do not know you any different.”
“Exactly. And you are gay since the day you were born, I don’t know you any different.”
“Do you find gay sex disgusting and therefore me?”
I cover my ears and say: “Nanananananananananananana.”
He looks hurt.
“So you do think I’m disgusting?”
“Whoa, stop right there my friend. SEX IS DIRTY. That is why my parents, sister, brothers and my friends don’t have sex. They get pregnant the same way Maria from the Bible got pregnant.”
He grins.

In 2213
“Europe, October 2013,” says Bogdan to the large screen. The screen instantly shows images, movies and articles about hot issues of that time frame. He accidentally drops his glass. His fathers run towards him.
“Bogdan, are you alright?” asks father Mikhail.
“Look, at this. Back in 2013 people discriminated gay people. They acted like it is some disease. They were short-sighted and mean.” He has tears in his eyes.
“No those people were scared,” responds father Naum.
“I don’t understand!”
Both fathers sit down, one on each side.
“Let me tell you an even older story about jews and black people.”

That was a little sneak preview into how I view the future. Maybe one day… One should dream right? Until that day comes, we might have to take small steps. Starting with… you know what? Make up your own mind! In the meantime I have to rethink buying my friend a “Sorry ladies, I love bananas” shirt and think about a design for my “It’s a pleasure to meet you, I’m black” shirt.

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