Who run the world? Girls! Part I

Written by: Jehan Daal

Time to talk about my religion: Powerful women in all shapes and sizes. Yup, boobs upfront, balls (as a figure of speech) and fire in the belly. Today I present to you: my grandma. If you think that she is some old drooling woman, think again! I’ll give you 6 reasons why my grandma runs the world. A top 10 is impossible, otherwise this column would turn into a book.

My grandma runs the world because she…

  1. Drives like men do
    On the island Curacao, they disregard the traffic regulations. A red traffic light is just an accessory and having right of way doesn’t mean you will get it. Gladys (my grandma) is an exception. She steps on the accelerator and doesn’t care if she has to stand in the middle of the road. She has the right to go first and therefore takes it! Even more cool is the fact that they let her have it.
  2. Is a.k.a. “The Lioness”
    Her loved ones are very important to her. She likes to spoil them, take care of them and kick their butt if needed. Watch out if you are deliberately hurting her people…you will release her inner lioness.
  3. Is 74 and still stylish
    Her hair pinned up, dressed in a lovely skirt and a blouse in a trendy, but classy color. Everything goes together, it simply works. It was her 74th b-day this week, but still she is up-to-date when it comes to fashion.
  4. Manages people
    She knows exactly how she wants things to be done. Even if people disagree, in the end they all do as told! Too bad that she is too old to run for president. 😉
  5. Kicks your ass if you try to bullshit her
    Two family members parked a rental car on the sidewalk and got a wheel boot. Since the family members have to run off to the airport to get home, my grandma and grandpa pay the fine. They arrive at the building and want to park their car, but there are no parking spaces. Because my grandfather has problems with his knee, my grandma decides to park her car next to the sidewalk behind a customs car. A policeman sees her and makes clear that she cannot park there. She tells her husband to go by himself, because she predicts that the police would walk up to her. And she is right. He tells her to remove the car immediately. How on earth can she be so bold to park here, even though he tells her not to? She tells him that her husband cannot walk that far and that they are about to bring money for the public treasury. The policeman doesn’t give a damn. She could have parked in the parking space for disabled persons. All fired up, she gets out of the car. “See, there is nothing wrong with my legs. If I would have parked there, you would have gave me a fine for parking there while I’m not disabled!” She raises her voice. People are staring. The policeman asks for her driver’s license to give her a fine for parking here. She informs him that she will be parking on exact the same spot, on when she will be paying the fine.
    “Maybe you should tell the government to create some parking space here,” she says with a sarcastic voice. He walks away. “Sir, you forget my fine!”
    ” You will receive it at home.”
    Another year has gone by and still no fine, maybe he lost her address 😉
  6. Is a great negotiator
    The perfect dress stares at me and I stare back. And even better, it fits me like a glove. And the best thing is that I do not pay the full amount like the other customers. My grandma is with me and she thinks that the price is ridiculous and she is not afraid to say so. She negotiates until the owner gets a bit annoyed, and I get the discount. Yeah, baby!

Who run the world? Girls! Yes, we run this… WORLD!

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